Dear beloved D. (aka Macallan)

 I miss you so many times. I was just watching a reels with Dr. Gabor Maté talking about the silent suffering of children from an alcoholic parent. My eyes started to water, I remembered that I am a child of an alcoholic mother and a father addicted to games of chance such as the fcking euromillions raffle. Then I remembered you and I, our pain. I went immediately to see your picture, saw the one you hair is blowing long and beautiful in the wind. I thought with relief that at least you were happy, but then I remembered how you said once that, like me, you also retrieve from social media when you're aching really bad. I felt like saying to you that I miss you everyday and I wish you always had present my love for you. But then, once again, I wasn't able to tell you anything. I'm just here again, writing to you, these simple words you'll never read. My belly bottom aches, my womanhood has been hurting for a long time too. Anyway, I also remembered of how I used to remember you everyday for the past years and now I don't get to do it as often. That's time and circumstances I am dealing with. Sometimes I still think of you, of course, when the sky is red and it's looking like it's going to rain. 

I'm still very sorry for not being able to tell you all that went on meanwhile, all so heartbreaking, unexpected and confusing. Who would have known things would get even more messed and involve another of them. It's all so crazy that sometimes it seems like it was all just a messy dream with some comforting moments that I wish were lasting in our heart forever. 

God, how much I love you!! It's still the same, when one remembers it for even a little while, like now. Allowing myself to feel that intensity and immeasurable feeling again gets unbelievable and almost unbearable all over again. I don't think I ever felt this category of love, like I've had for you two, you know. 

I hope you're okay, though I know it has been impossible to be okay in these awful times. At least, I'm thinking, that your offspring will be fine and you two can have your bubble of love to protect you from the awfulness around. 

I love you, babe, "don't forget it", as you used to say to me and I'm sorry if I forgot too many times that you had loved me once upon a time too. I'm still all yours. 

Love, your "Jack".

STATE OF THE PLANET — 2025 UPDATE

🪸 Coral Reefs
2023–2025: Most severe global bleaching event ever recorded.
84% of reefs worldwide experienced bleaching-level heat stress.
6th mass bleaching of the Great Barrier Reef since 2016.
Recovery outlook: less than 10% of reefs likely to recover naturally if heating continues.

🔻 Consequences: loss of fish breeding grounds → decline in marine biodiversity → destabilization of coastal economies.

---
🌡️ Ocean & Climate Tipping Points
Ocean surface temperatures: highest ever measured in 2024–2025.
Acidification: pH drop of 30% since pre-industrial levels → shells, plankton, and corals dissolve faster.
Oxygen loss: many coastal areas becoming “dead zones.”
Predicted irreversible damage threshold: around 2030–2035 if emissions remain at current pace.

---
🍽️ Food Systems and Global Security
Timeline What’s Expected Notes
2025–2030 Decline in marine fish stocks (20–30%) Due to coral collapse + warming waters
2030–2040 Major stress on crop yields Especially wheat, maize, rice due to heatwaves + droughts
2040–2050 Food insecurity affecting 3–4 billion people Coastal and tropical nations hit hardest
2050+ Global food shortages, migration, conflict risks Unless massive mitigation achieved

---
⚠️ Why Action Is So Hard
“Climate inertia”: even if we stopped emissions today, heat stored in the oceans would keep warming the planet for decades.
Global production and consumption systems rely on continuous expansion — difficult to reverse without political and social overhaul.
Policy lag: promises (COP meetings) ≠ implementation.

---
💡 Still Possible
Rapid cuts in fossil fuels by 50% before 2035 could slow down coral loss and stabilize oceans.
Restoring mangroves, sea grasses, and wetlands can buffer acidification.
Local coral restoration and marine protected areas show some recovery if heatwaves stop.
Personal and local resilience — sustainable diets, waste reduction, community adaptation — matter for buffering the impacts.
---
🕯️ Reality Check
> We’ve entered the age of consequences — but not of total hopelessness.
The inertia is real, but so is the capacity for localized healing if the global system stabilizes soon enough.

Catastrophy

 Corals bleached out

Birds are going extinct 

Trees are dying out 

No more life in the abyss

As the polar caps melted

And the Amazon burned

The planet is suffocating 

The animals lost their home 

The US absolutist monarchy

 If he wants to be a king

Bring down on him the guillotine 

Do the revolution of the people 

Do the rebellion of the oppressed

Start by invading his golden saloon 

And as he's always been the main jester 

Make an example of the orange baboon 

Darkness unfolded

 You were so fragile to me

that I took your heart and tore it apart 

I was so strong to you

that you shredded me to pieces 

and we were forever left in the dark 

Love, those same old stories

 I loved everyone in a way that they'll never know entirely. 

I've fallen in love by a few too. One or two or even three, made me go a little dependent. 

I was in time to see it beforehand in one or two as well. 

To look at it all with love and care and attention, to feel, to see, to reach, and to pass by. 

 I just feel it

 The good moments I had in my life were so fleeting that nowadays I struggle to tell if they really happened or if my whole life everything was always eventually turned into reality bad things. 

I miss you, F.

 I wish I knew how to feel the pure ecstatic joy of a child, but when I was one I was always suffocated and had to be mild. That's the big difference between me and them: they're happy and I'm depressed. They have fun with friends and family, whereas I am always alone and though people are always drawn to me I never get to have real fun. Well, I did laugh a lot because of you, F., and that's one of the things I miss most now. You were kind of a brute and immature, but I really couldn't be very far from you. I guess I did like you more than I thought. You asked me if you had marked me. Yes, F., you certainly did and I should've told you I would be okay with what you were saying, but I probably wouldn't really, as I can't be with someone knowing that they had someone to begin with. Because I've always tried to keep my principles even though it has costed me everything in my life and I don't have anything good or whatsoever in this life of mine. 

 Can you be a wildflower in a greenhouse? Yes, you can. I'm an orchid.