"And now, the end is near"

I think I'm finally going to die and it seems quite a proper time,
for it has been shown to me that there is no hope for a happiness that is true.

thank you and goodbye

What I regret the most in general is to have always put others first than myself,
I should've been there more for me
even when it meant not caring for others.
I loved too much and was loved and taken care of too little.
But as it was a no refund and no return trip, I'll just have to settle with what I got,
stop complaining, because it was quite a lot and it could've been a bit worse (though since I remember, all the suffering - being bullied, battered, bruised, aflicted by rare and grave diseases with daily symptoms that impaired a minimum quality of life and having been without support through it all in pain and misery - was quite awful; that death, at lack of alternative, becomes the biggest desire for ultimate peace from all earthly wounds).

Finding true love is rare and at least I got to feel and know what a bit of happiness was like.