Easy lover.

I am an easy lover
my heart is solely my own
but it's given to another
whose soul is shown.

My hands sleep in his hair
waving thoughts of sinful
desires that I cannot bare
with my body brimful.

Whenever the old skies
present their pink strokes
my relentless heart dies

Imagining constraining ropes
around my old lover's soul
taking it inside me as a whole.

Society, this crazy breed... in Portugal.

Portugal is one of the European countries who is having to deal with the crisis by asking external financial aid, as Greece and others. Our deficit has reached values that exceed what we can get by cutting our own expenses and by increasing taxes. All in all, it has become a really excruciating scenery to everyone who inhabits Portugal, that's why in the latest years the emigration rose. Young people who don't see any good future perspectives have fled to other countries (like so many friends of mine).

We have been assisting to an overflow of the market, that being too many people to fewer number of job vacancies. Unfortunately since a long time ago, our culture imprinted that we should all strive to have a superior education and now, like me, we all have the degrees but no real application for them. The few positions are occupied by people who already had a comfortable financial background; the power and money seems to move from generation to generation within the families that already own them (a kind of modern oligarch system).

To give you an example of what I'm talking about, most of youngsters that just finished their college are already stuck in Call Centers, not having the possibility to try out in what they've been trained to for so many years.

It's all quite non-sense when you analyse it. 

Most people are quite pessimistic about the future, because everyday we're assaulted by the Media with information about how big is our debt (plus the constraining measures that are being taken by the current Government) and how long will it take to have a positive growth. That's what comes out of living too many years above our own possibilities, taking loans and credit, making unnecessary buildings all over (that now are empty and for cheap sale). 

Well, it's almost 180 billion euros of debt we're talking about, so it's looking really dark.

(written for an interview)

All I need, by Radiohead.

I am the next act waiting in the wings

I am an animal trapped in your hot car

I am all the days that you choose to ignoree

You are all I need

You are all I need

I am in the middle of your picture

Lying in the reeds

I am a moth who just wants to share your light

I'm just an insect trying to get out of the night

I only stick with you because there are no others

You are all I need

You are all I need

I'm in the middle of your picture

Lying in the reeds

S'all wrong

S'alright

S'alright

S'all wrong

S'alright

S'alright

S'alright

I fell and I rose.


There's no one I could love more than I love him; my 1,86m man with hard bones and hard courage :)


I believe.

If you saw how much I bleed, would you stop hurting me? If you had a slight idea of the expression of my grief, 
of my entire pain, would you stop hurting me? Do you know? Is your conscience aware of what you made with me? 
In times of war, play dead; there are no winners...
I get myself writing death related issues. 
It all started because I found out that love doesn't last much, truly it doesn't exist.

There's a light.

Deflections. Reflections.
It's all a game of lights. And shadows,
the ones we let exist by merely putting obstacles
to light's passage.

Colorations. Discolorations.
Tinted hearts and suspended birds
freed from their cages.
An mirrors where the light shatters
and rains down on the obstacles.

I was wondering why my friends never say anything, why they're so unavailable... and then, it hit me: they're just human! 

Tears of flesh

Once I said I would never understand why some people cut themselves, so intentionally as seating down to pick up a pen and start writing, but today I had an epiphany and it was just like a good old friend told me.

He used to cut himself for a long time and now I understand what is the drive, what kind of sensation and feeling pushes one's whole body to do it...

I stood on that verge, on the tip, on the bloody edge and I backed down.

It's the pain in the deepest, that spreads, filling you, sometimes caused only by emptiness, others, by  many other reasons accumulated or not, but it's when it gets so unbearable that it seems that you need to cut yourself so that it gets away, leaking from you, through the tears of flesh.

But does it really?
I don't think so, that's why I backed down, away from the vortex of abyss.

Isn't Capitalism a blast?

We can own everything and nothing at the same time!

It's so illusory and ridiculous, but it's like in those situations when someone important for us dies and we carry on just by breathing; like many things in life it's what we do because it has to be like this to keep us going until we die.

Differences men vs. women

“There are distinct differences between male and female brains. Female brains have a larger hippocampus, which usually makes them better at attention and memory. Male brains have a bigger parietal cortex, which helps when fending off an attack. Male brains confront challenges differently than female brains. Women are hard-wired to communicate with language, detail, empathy; Men, not so much. It doesn’t mean they are any less capable of emotion; they can talk about their feelings. It’s just that most of the time, they’d really, rather not.”


in Grey's Anatomy, season 8 ep. 4.

Limitless

I knew him on a sunshine day
and I felt everything in my heart
go swirling and filling like waves in the sea
and then as we held hands I felt blown away.

I knew through his eyes that he loved me
and that the moment when we met
would stay forever in debt
with every other moment in our lives,

For that instance that we felt like floating
and we knew that we were finally born
and we wouldn't ever die again,

Has made me feel like surpassing
all the moments that I felt torn,
and that he was my man.

Sonnet #116, by W. Shakespeare

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments, love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove.

O no, it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wand'ring bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.

Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come,
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,

But bears it out even to the edge of doom:

If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

"Be interested, more than trying to be interesting; love others, growing yourself everyday until you die."