Friday 26 April 2024

 Oh but it did start and it went awfully and ended, without even having a real chance of a true beginning.

To live and to die without you

 Doesn't it bother you to know we are all going to die? 

Yeah, but it bothers me even more to know we're alive and we never got to be together.

 Did you really not love me at all?

Thursday 25 April 2024

Artificial love

 I never wanted your artificial love 
I wanted more
A deep honest true faithful bond
That you're probably not even capable of

Abandonment

 I only abandon people after they have abandoned me, because I know they will do it again and I can't bare to go through it again nor do I have ever deserved such mistreatments.

Sunday 21 April 2024

Setting Sun - Pearl Jam


The cast was made to reset broken bones
But there's no such thing to fix a love gone wrong
Keep knocking the door 'cause I know someone's there
I wait on the porch hoping someday, I'll be let in
They say in the end everything will be okay
If it's not okay, well then, it ain't the end
Had dreams to you I would belong
Had the dream you would stay with me till kingdom come
Turns out forever has come and gone
Am I the only one hanging on?
Hand in hand, yeah, we took it on
You answered my prayers, now from my knees, I can't get up
Lost patience with time, yeah, hurry up your patience tonight
I'd like some of yours, in trade, can take all of mine
I dreamt to you I would belong
Held the dream you would stay with me till kingdom come
Turns out it was more like hit-and-run
Am I the only one hanging on?
Whoa, am I the only one hanging on?
If you could see what I see now
You'd find a way to stay somehow
Oh, if you could see, yeah, what I see now
You'd make your way to stay somehow
May your days be long till kingdom come
May our days be long before kingdom come
May our days be long until kingdom come
We can become one last setting Sun
Am I the only one hanging on?
We could become one last setting Sun
Or be the Sun at the break of dawn
Let us not fade
Let us not fade

Friday 19 April 2024

In this life

 I feel that this life of mine, I'm only here to suffer as atonement for the previous life. Only pain and misery. Feels like I can't have anything more. 

You gave me life

 and then treated me so badly 
destroying me every time 
like if I was an enemy to kill
why?
I haven't had the will to live
because of you
all this time

Wednesday 17 April 2024

All this time

 All this time, I've been wanting to forget you, to erase you from within me, because I feel that each time I am dooming me even more and all these bad things happening to my family feels like a continuation of you and all your friends bad energy towards me.

Please release me. I know that the person I love was only a little part of you. I've asked so many times to be free from all this, especially this illusion of certainty that we were true and that we were destined for time and time again. 

Saturday 13 April 2024

 "no coward soul is mine",

tell me my love, was it not each time our eyes met in the dark, risking the peril, the utmost delight, our glimpse of paradise? 


my mouth still hungers

for your promised last kiss 

each dawn that I wait

missing you like the rain

again

to ever caress my cheek 


the fields have grown tall

dancing in the wind

in tones of your green 

and I try to stay alive 

just to see the moon

one more time